Видео

I didn’t know this was common for people with ADHD. I just got out of first relationship in college and was diagnosed while in college. I never built up what a relationship was supposed to look like growing up. My partner did treat me like I was nothing I didn’t know any better. He would rotate between the same people and cheat. He would verbally abuse me and not think he did anything wrong. I couldn’t even get him to understand the concept of empathy. I kept giving him chances because I thought he would change. I was going to leave before and then he started to try. He bought me flowers, he helped with things, and he took me out. It never got better I knew things were going to get worse. I never trusted him. I didn’t know how to leave without being pulled back in. I’m glad I left before things got more violent.

just diagnosed with ADHD and medicated 2 months ago. 33 yrs of marriage my husband is a saint he. Just said the medication has saved his life

The comments really prove that the real problem isn’t a “disability.” These are bad people.

My husband is 23 years old, Adhd only issue I use I had with him was lack of communication, but I love him a lot, and trying to keep our marriage works best. He is so kind ,geniun, more like a good friend of mine.

I'm in a relationship with someone who I think already has learned helplessness through their relashionship with their mother. We are still young and living with our parents, and their mother seams to always "cover" for his responsabilities, at the point that he doesn't even know where to start when he has to organize his own dresser. For me, who's parents almost never cover up for my responsabilities, even when I'm incapable of doing them due to relapses in my depression, it's even more frustrating to see that. He always asks for his mother for help with literally everything, and that would be fine if she didn't step in most of the time to just do the things for him instead of helping. I'm really friends with my his mom, and we've talked about her husbands behaviour, which i always called "weponized helplessness", because he's the kind of person to just say "oh, I can't do that, I don't know how to do it as well as you do" to every little thing, from housekeeping to simple tasks like going out to buy groceries. I've literally seem this 40 year old man promise for 2 whole days to go to the supermarket, that turned into "I'll go, but can you come with me hon? I don't know how to choose the right things" and finally she just gave in and went herself. I went with her because I felt so unconfortable with the whole situation, and on the way there she said to me that it was knnd of her fault for him being like that, cuz she always stepd in to cover for his lack of responsability. I just fear she's doing the same with my partner and it might become normalized to them. We've talked about their father's behaviour, and they also get really frustraded with it, but when I talk about how odd it feels that they go to their mother for everything and just let her do it for them, they really don't get why I get so irritaded. We've had some short-heated arguments about it. Of course, I could never compare them with their father, for multiple reasons but mostly because they're still young and might really need the help still. Sometimes I even stop to think if I'm not frustrated because I also need that help, but I can't and never had this need met with my parents. But even if I can attribute part of my frustration to this, I know there is part that's actually about them. I just don't know how to talk to them about it. One of my biggest fears is assuming a "parent" role in a romantic relationship, and sometimes I see myself doing things for them that are much of a mother kind of thing to do. But I can't stand things that they haven't got done be there for days, specially because I know that if it stays that way, their mother will end up doing it. And she's already pretty overworked being a stay at home and caring for a neurodivergent 3 year old and her manchild of a husband. So even if I ask my partner if they want help getting something done - help, not me doing it for them - and they decline, if it's still there the next day I'm so inclined to do it because of their mother. It just feels like a non win situation sometimes, you know? Anyways, I'm rambling here cuz I'm out of therapy for months now and I just started typing and couldn't stop anymore lol but if someone actually reads it, thanks for coming to my Ted Talk 🙏

I like to explain Executive Function as POSITIVE skills which stands for: Planning, Organization, Self-awareness, Initiation, Time-management, Inhibition, Visualizing outcomes, and Evaluating priorities.

Awesome thank you

Thank you. I first understood my mother was a covert narc, then my husband, got out of there, went to weekly therapy then finally discovering I have ADHD😢

This is quite something and needs to be watched and listened to over and over again.

That's a bright future step that I like to take in the near future

Hi, am here because my son had ADHD and he just committed suicide may 22, 2024 and he was 21. Am trying my best to understand why he did this, he did tell me back when he was 10 years old that he wanted to take he’s life because he said he couldn’t understand school and I did talk to him about it but I guess it wasn’t good enough. Am feeling heartbroken and wishing I could of done more

I always knew I was "different" but always overlooked ADHD, all I ever heard about it was that it was about hyperactivity and not being able to sit still. The fact it's so much different in women than men is why I missed what was under my nose. Hearing about girls with ADHD and some of the bizarre thing I do I thought were just Victoria things other girls with ADHD do. Like talking for a really long time really fast and not even pausing to swallow. I'm just so desperate to get everything out I'm like in a state of "I have to talk NOW, I have to say this NOW, I can swallow later" until five minutes later I'm sounding like Sid the sloth from Ice Age........and I'm still talking.

Great content and lots of informations about adhd. Thank you 😊

I've been in classrooms with the 'whirling dervish' ADHD child and the school has had no real resource or plan, despite the various IEP stuff. And, the effect is children being parked for hours each day, not learning much. I've watched this wondering how to be of service.

Dang when he said that fear of pain is a big factor of why we don’t commit suicide it hit me hard. If I wasn’t so scared of pain I would already be gone

Just realizing how blessed I am. I just git diagnosed inattentive type at 38, after post natal depressions, anxietydisorder and 3 burnouts. Everything makes sence now. But I'm lucky that my husband is my rock. We divide the complete care load, we work both part time. He has also all the appointments in his agenda for both of us, in case (often) I forget something. He knows what my ADD struggle is and looks out for me. But poor fella went through a lot with me. 😅 Sending out so much love to all the ADD moms.

I have to get all the shit together around the house, work and basically everything in everyday life what money can't buy. And i still feel sorry I can't make my spouse feel better while she's scrolling through useless Instagram crap. Or when she's walking up tired at 9 while I'm mixing concrete in my backyard since 7 am. Am I selfish?

Crap. Less than 5 min in and I have to rewind because my mind wondered. 🤦🏽‍♀️

So it’s like having a 3rd child??

Shooting for a B+ when my parents were dissatisfied by the one A- on my report card 💀🫠 feels rough, but I get how that Should help. Just feels rough

What an amazing and informative video ❤❤ Thank you😊

really emotional 😢

great video ! i really recommend more of these for us young women who are struggling thank you ❤️❤️❤️❤️

I swear you people are not educated enough to know the difference between adhd and narcissism smh. 🤦🏿‍♂️

Suicide is for quitters

Everything is great - EXCEPT - the medication part. You don't need to drug your kids, you need to coach them and help them work through these obstacles. The best brain/ADHD doctors state that "they have never seen a case where medication worked" and "it should only be used as a stop-gap". My wife manages a pediatrician office and she has never seen medication be successful. Parenting is hard and parenting an ADHD child is harder, but there are many positive qualities to an ADHD child too. They are worth the extra effort and you will be rewarded.

I always feel like I'm going to make them uncomfortable, like I'm going to say something wrong or overstep. In the past tense, I'm hypercritical of what I did say. Rough

I am stopping cannabis now as someone with ADHD because it made me easily irritated with my kids

Any more information and tools for both partners? I have severe adhd, my wife has depression.

I'm 46 was officially diagnosed at 45 . Unfortunately because of my past I can not find a doctor to give me the medicine I need. So here I am almost divorced after 17 years of marriage because my change of life everything is in super hyperdrive and I literally am rolling on steam grasping for any life line any bit of comfort everything I see is oh take this.. Well where please tell me where cause god knows I've tried

😢

I feel broken by shame

😭😭

I have ADHD but never let it take over me. I still have control over my body so i constantly pick only the good sides of ADHD and dump the bad side

Do you have som resources in spanish ? Your information is excellent to understand adhd. Thanks

I don’t think I was supposed to listen to this. I was already feeling like a huge burden. My wife has been doing all these things the best she can for over 20 years and now I feel like she just can’t deal with me anymore, in spite of trying my best to overcome all my faults.

What medications have shown efficacy in CDS?

What about ppl with the inward ADD the non hyper one. That’s what I have. My mind is adhd squierrel, but I’m not full of energy like ppl with ADHD, in fact I’m super sensitive to stimulants.

I think it's really important to couch the socializing opportunities at coops for homeschooled kids with the fact that anyone with Autism will NOT learn how to socialize themselves! This is a major, integral deficit with ASD and ADHD is that they don't get the clues or does not wait to consider the clues!Homeschooling can give opportunity for the parent to teach them one on one, in a quiet, safe environment how to behave in certain situations and coops may be a time they can practice what they learned.

🎯 **Perfectionism Overview** 🎯 1️⃣ Perfectionism: Good or Bad? It's aiming for super high standards but can be a pain sometimes. 2️⃣ Signs: Quick to spot flaws, harsh on mistakes, and delay stuff fearing failure. 3️⃣ Upsides: Can drive you forward, but the downside? Fear-based perfectionism brings procrastination, rigid thinking, and kills creativity. 4️⃣ Types: There's rigid (linked to self-worth) and adaptive (high standards but chill if you slip). 5️⃣ Impact: Perfectionism messes with your head, so recognizing it's crucial for your mental health. 6️⃣ Fix: Set doable goals, see tasks as manageable chunks, and start with baby steps. 7️⃣ Solution: Get to know yourself, be kind, and celebrate what makes you, you. 8️⃣ Tackle: Picture yourself winning, speak kindly to yourself, and ask for what you need. 9️⃣ Shift: Catch negative thoughts, swap them with positive ones. 🔟 Motivate: Reward yourself after tasks, stick to a plan, and know when it's perfectionism or ADHD kicking in.

I'm trying to get diagnosed, but because my grades were good before my burnout/depression, the doctor thinks I just have residual symptoms from depression. I have always struggled with motivation. I get easily interested and excited about new things, but often hyperfocus on details and then my energy runs out and I never finish anything without deadlines. I had many common symptoms of inattentive ADHD as a child, but the DIVA-5 sadly focuses on outward symptoms. I also experienced childhood trauma, so it could be that, ADHD or both. I was a reserved kid, but often got very talkative with friends, not understanding social rules about when to speak and small talk. But to every adult I was a well behaved smart kid, who just daydreamed often. I have worked on my perfectionism for a while, but I feel like it is natural to me to be detail oriented and go with the flow. I have tried many studying methods now in uni, but the best for me is just read through things, and not get stuck. As a perfectionist it is hard to not google every thought I get during studying. I have also started to just write essays without meticulous planning, because if I plan too much I get bored. This is still a journey, but next I'm trying to desensitize myself to failing!

Adult ADHD here 🙋‍♂️ had it since a child was put in SED special Education program etc the list goes on.. I was using THC as a medicinal use for my ADHD I have to say point blank it worked my mind moved faster than it thinks and THC slowed them both down to an equal level, remember I use small amounts of THC 1 maybe 2 puffs. but the damn thing works, at first my brain was chemically unbalanced but the THC somehow slowed the brain and regulated the brain chemicals and equalized them.. it may not be for everyone but for me it works I use to barely hold down a job because of my ADHD but now been employed in the same job for over 10 Yrs... If used right it chemically balances the brain which by itself is a HUGE impact to science study...

Nobody talks about the effect that narcissism has on the 'family' whose son refuses to leave the narcissistic female. Family relationships have been completely destroyed because of the victim's denial and refusal to get help.

Me, having anxiety because this is hitting home so much LOL I was just diagnosed with ADHD last year at age 46. So much makes sense now. My psychiatrist and I have been working on treating me for severe anxiety for so many years. I am realizing that a lot of my anxiety has come from ADHD and not understanding it. My mother has OCD so I didn't think I was a perfectionist. But I am a perfectionist when it comes to social interactions and work. I love being aware of these things now because that means I have a place to work from. And it gives me confidence knowing that I can work on something tangible

Wow I cant imagine him thinking any of this is necessary. I hope it can come to fruition

So episodic memory can be a way of self sabotage? Ruminating?

Can someone timestamp this and be a hero pls lol?

For me it was not the right move to learn how to hold back, rather to learn to accept that I can not be friends or in a relationship with people who can't deal with the way my brain works. I hate small talk and enjoy getting deep into topics and also personal things, so I don't want people around me who are overwhelmed by relevant things.

I have ADHD and CDS and I think it’s not positive at all, especially CDS. It destroyed my life. It was such a relief for me when I experienced reality

If I was a kid would I want to take adhd stimulants for CDS ? No. Perhaps for just math classes later on, Yes. Do I want to be able to take stimulants as an adult ? Yes.